How a Zombie Apocalyptic Shooter Can Make You a Better Parent (And Human)
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In the realm of digital entertainment, few might dare to suggest that a zombie first person shooter could offer more than just adrenaline-pumping action. Yet, games like Back 4 Blood (or the developer’s original Left 4 Dead) hold within their chaotic universes the seeds for nurturing something profoundly human: better parenting skills and, quite frankly, the potential to become a better person overall.
While clearly not designed for children, many mature (17+) titles featuring multiplayer modes generally require cooperation. Understanding how these skills are used in these games may seem like unlikely tools for parenting, but when the knowledge is then applied to your family-friendly games, you have untapped potential for building strong relationships around technology.
The Power of Cooperative Play
Cooperative modes offer opportunities to work on teamwork, communication, and empathy in a fun and engaging environment. Engaging in these modes allows players to appreciate the strengths of others, delegate tasks effectively, and enhance their problem-solving abilities. Players learn the art of give-and-take in conversations, how to manage frustration, and the importance of sacrificing personal interests for the greater good of the team. These skills are fundamental for fostering productive and positive interactions in various aspects of life.
Understanding the benefits is only part of the equation though. Even though we’ve been learning about cooperation since our earliest school days, it’s easy to become a raging dictatorial jerk while button mashing the controller of your favorite game. How do you actually be a better parent while playing cooperative games?
Dialogic Interaction: The Key to Productive Conversations
First, a bit of theory. Dialogic reading is when you jazz up storytime with questions, predictions, and those oh-so-scary monster voices. It’s more than fun; it’s a research-backed powerhouse for developing your child’s language and critical thinking skills, based on the foundational work of Whitehurts in the 1980s. It's all about turning passive listening into active engagement. (More on dialogic viewing…)
And it works for watching videos and playing video games, too. Next time you’re playing, pick one or two of these strategies to try. No need to do it all, just a little goes a long way.
Make plans together: Don't just zone out while playing. Pause between levels and strategize.
Ask questions: Don’t blow through cut scenes but rather take in the story and ask, "What do you think will happen next?"
Model how to make mistakes gracefully: Intentionally try out things that you wouldn’t normally do and then talk about how it feels to fail and how to motivate for the next attempt.
Celebrate Team Achievements: Emphasize the importance of collective success over individual triumphs. Celebrate when the team completes a level or achieves a goal, reinforcing the value of working together.
Encourage Role-Sharing: Swap roles or characters periodically to give everyone a chance to experience different aspects of the game. This promotes flexibility and a deeper understanding of the game's dynamics.
Practice Active Listening: Encourage your child to express their thoughts and strategies during the game. Show that you value their input by listening attentively and incorporating their ideas into the gameplay.
Set Boundaries and Rules: Establish clear guidelines for gaming, such as time limits and appropriate behavior. This teaches respect for rules and the importance of balance between gaming and other activities.
Lead by Example: Demonstrate good sportsmanship by treating other players with respect, handling wins and losses gracefully, and showing patience during challenging moments.
Foster Empathy: Use gaming scenarios to discuss feelings and perspectives. For example, if a character is in a difficult situation, talk about how they might be feeling and what can be done to help.
Encourage Reflection: After gaming sessions, discuss what was learned and how it can be applied to real-life situations. This helps solidify the lessons and makes the gaming experience more meaningful.
By embracing a dialogic approach to your gaming routine, you not only enhance the gaming experience but also use it as a tool for teaching valuable life skills. Gaming becomes more than just entertainment; it becomes a platform for learning, growth, and connection.
The key to leveraging technology, including video games, for positive personal growth lies in how we engage in conversations around these experiences. It's not just about consuming content together but about actively discussing and engaging with it—before, during, and after the session. This practice applies to all forms of digital media, from games to streaming services like Netflix and social platforms like TikTok.
Have fun, and if you’d like a few suggestions of games to try, here’s our family-friendly favorites. (Please confirm that the game is right for your family!)
Super Mario 3D World
Gang Beasts
Forbidden Island
Overcooked! 2
Snipperclips
My First Castle Panic
Portal 2
Super Mario Bros. Wonder
Dr. Carla Engelbrecht is a highly-selective mom, product leader, and internationally recognized expert on children’s education and entertainment technology. As founder of Betweened, she's on a mission to transform social entertainment for kids and their families. If this was helpful, please consider sharing with a friend! If you haven’t already, sign up for the newsletter to get more articles like this as well as updates on Betweened, where we’re building mindful, family-friendly social entertainment.
